Here's the third pack from my "Card storage case and value pack with a bunch of old reject packs that didn't initially sell that you would have never bought if you'd just gotten that Braves team set last year you big dummy" box. I'm opening them from what I thought would be the worst to the best. '94 Ultra beat out '06 Upper Deck and whatever that Pastime pack was by virtue of it being the oldest pack in the box and the guaranteed mid nineties gaudy insert. Unfortunately, when I took a look at the pack it was obvious that it had been sorely abused. There's a big warp right in the middle of the Ultra logo and the pack is hard as a brick. I don't think this one will end happily, folks.
Yep. There's our solid mass o' cards, stuck together like glue. Bad, bad, things happened to this pack. At the bare minimum it got wet and fused all the cards together at some point, but it also looks like someone maybe used it to even out the legs on a table. The cards are just loose enough on one corner so I can make out the name and card number on some of them, so here are the former cards that make up this pack.
486 David Nied
520 Chan Ho Park
526 Larry Walker
554 Curt Schilling
572 Derek Bell
stuck together
stuck together
stuck together
somebody on the Red Sox
stuck together
somebody on the White Sox
somebody on the Indians
somebody on the Royals
somebody on the Brewers
Kirby Puckett
Jim Abbott
5 of 5 John Smoltz Stikeout King
Aww, man. The wrecked Smoltzie hurts. Of course that is the only card that looks salvageable out of the pack. The others are fused together pretty tightly. It's a shame too, there seem to be a lot of stars in this pack. Puckett, Schilling, Walker, Abbot... dang. Oh hell with it, I'm gonna chuck it anyway, I'll try to rip the cards apart to see who else is in here.
Revised list after successful prying apart of fused cards:
486 David Nied
520 Chan Ho Park
526 Larry Walker
554 Curt Schilling
572 Derek Bell
586 Todd Benzinger
354 Eric Davis
308 Rafael Palmeiro
320 Frank Viola
328 Chuck Finley
333 James Baldwin
345 Dennis Martinez
362 David Cone
372 Tyrone Hill
394 Kirby Puckett
397 Jim Abbott
5 of 5 John Smoltz Stikeout King
Dangit, the pack actually got better. Eric Davis in the Tigers uniform. This will probably be the best pack out of the box and the cards are all mangled. Some good pitchers in Martinez, Finley and Cone. The Chan Ho Park, James Baldwin and Tyrone Hill Cards are stamped as rookie cards. And I know Rafael Palmeiro is as popular as Judas nowadays, but I don't care if he failed a test I'll always respect him for telling that congressional panel off. Those hearings were a showboating waste of time, and they had better things to do than play MLB commissioner even if the actual commissioner is a gibbering fool. There are 800 wars going on, the banking industry is about to go belly up, jobs are being outsourced, the gray wolf is endangered, Britney done lost her mind, Hillary's still in the race, giant radioactive starfish found in Antarctica, Hertiage has supershortprints, Georgia's in a drought, frikin' sharks with laserbeams on their heads, superbugs, genocide, terrorism, racism, housing bubbles, religious extremism, the New York Mets, all these problems in the world and do they address any of them? Do they sit Britney's ass down in front of the committee and tell her: "You get wise! You get to church!" Nope, they chastised some athletes for having the gall to go out and entertain people. Meh, feh, and bleh on all of them. The whole lot in Congress is as worthless as my dinged, warped and mutilated Chan Ho Park rookie card.
Larry Walker sez:
"Aw crap, Dayf's ranting again. It's only a pack of baseball cards, man..."
I figure every creature deserves a warm meal, plus I don't want to listen to no jive-ass preacher talking to me about Heaven and Hell.
ReplyDeleteEven though you slipped The Miracle Mets onto your scary current megadisaster list, it must be admitted that this is a *really* good rave.
ReplyDeleteTell us how you really feel....
ReplyDelete(Why does everyone else--people who are clearly not me--pull Schilling cards in packs? Even mangled ones? Rrrr.)