Ugh. I'm bummed. I don't feel like opening a pack today. Nothing makes sense anymore. I mean.. the Red Sox?? Seriously?? They already have like eight starters. Is Wakefield now a utility infielder? Man... I just can't do it. No pack today. I'm just going to down a six pack of Zima and veg out to the Golden Girls marathon on Lifetime until the pain goes away.....
That's no way to talk, Pilgrim!
Holy crap, it's John Wayne!
Well, there are some things a man just can't run away from. Courage is being scared to death... and ripping that pack anyway. Go in there with all they've got and rip just one for the Gipper!
Um, that last one was Reagan...
Rip that pack, you son of a bitch!
Okay! Okay! I'm ripping!
114 Rob Schnieider
Why do I let John Wayne talk me into stuff.....
171 Rhonda Fleming
Hmmm... Rhonda did films with Ronald Reagan and John Payne, but not John Wayne. No, wait! She was a dance hall girl in In Old Oklahoma. That must be why John wanted me to open this pack. I like the classic stars out of this set. Check out that red hair!
128 Swoosie Kurtz
Needs a sammich. Just one sammich.
RK-KP Karo Parisyan Ring Kings AutoRelic #284/500
Autograph, um, jersey? You know what, let's just say jersey. Karo is an Armenian Judo MMA fighter. Here's Karo fighting Nick Diaz:
I don't understand this sport at all.
191 Kathie Lee Gifford
Is coming to South Park!
149 Gary Coleman
Is a P.I.M.P.
Ya know what, that pack was so terrible that I've forgotten all about my problems! THANKS JOHN WAYNE!!!