Today is the Pennsylvania Democratic primary, so I'll rip a pack to see if I can pull some Jimmy "The Greek" magic and prognosticate the results. Here's how it will work. The player's home state will count as 1 Thorzul "The Prussian" vote. If Obama already won the state, he gets a point; if Hillary won the state, she gets a point. If the state hasn't had a primary yet, or if one of the candidates was not on the ballot in a state, neither candidate gets a point. If the player was not born in the U.S., Vampires, Witches, and Pagans Party candidate Jonathon "The Impaler" Sharkey and perennial last-place candidate Lyndon LaRouche split the point.
Let's tear in.
BDP4 Chase Wright (TX, Clinton)
BDP10 Glen Perkins (MN, Obama)
BDPP50 Sean Doolittle Chrome (VA, Obama)
BDPP58 Jarrod Parker Chrome (IN, primary to be held on May 6, Sharkey and LaRouche split)
BDPP53 Mike Moustakas Gold (CA, Clinton)
BDPP66 Pedro Beato (D.R., another outsider split)
BDPP71 Joba Chamberlain (NE, Obama)
I haven't seen the Joba "pajamas" card yet, so that's cool. Plus, his corn-belt brethren helped put Obama over the top with the last delegate. Look for history to repeat itself tonight. Obama will triumph, prompting Clinton to throw in the towel. Lyndon and "The Impaler" follow suit and help throw their massive bases' support behind Obama which will carry him all the way to the White House in November.
Then again, I could be wrong.