I might be insane; after all of the anticipation, I've waited another two hours to open the box. It's like I'm trying to build the tension or test my willpower. Let's take just one more moment to register the full sensory experience of the box. It looks like a cube, which is not what I expected. It feels smooth, on account of the shrink wrap. It sounds like it's full of foil-wrapped packs of goodness. It smells plastic-y. It tastes...well, I wouldn't recommend tasting the box, wrapped or not. Enough of this nonsense. It's rippin' time!
I like what my contemporaries have been doing, so I present my first card of 2008:
144 Jerry Owens - I guess we're all taunting Steve with our pack rips today!
312 Ramon Hernandez - And Razor Ramon becomes the first Oriole of 2008. Let's hope he has a better season than he did last year, especially with Matt Wieters nipping at his heels.
211 Lyle Overbay
301 Chris Duffy
310 Kelvim Escobar
60 Jose Reyes
309 Ryan Church
224 Mark Buehrle - Sox #2!
268 Daric Barton RC
194 Chad Billingsley
291 Eugenio Velez RC - Judging from his "signature", I don't think he knows cursive.
81 Ray Durham GOLD 0495/2008
C08-JM John McCain - Awesome! I like Big Mac, even though he's compromised himself in the past to try to appeal to the Neocons. I'm also fairly certain that he's actually younger than Ray Durham.
141 Ryan Klesko
257 Classic Combos: Austin Kearns and Dmitri Young - I'm a big fan of Dmitri, and this card has a great background shot of the outfield wall in RFK Stadium. The Concrete Dump is Dead. Long live the Concrete Dump.
324 Jake Peavy NL Cy Young Award Winner
284 Lance Broadway RC - Sox #3!
179 Chris Young: Postseason Highlights NLDS - Great shot of Young and an unidentified teammate celebrating their sweep over the Cubs.
190 Russell Martin
10 Miguel Cabrera - I've gone back and edited this, since somehow I confused Miguel with Magglio Ordonez. Remember kids, don't drink and blog.
304 Jose Vidro - Perhaps this is the year that my roommate resists the urge to draft Jose.
178 Dustin Pedroia AL Rookie of the Year
181 Joe Borowski, Bobby Jenks, and JJ Putz: AL Saves Leaders -Aaand Sox #4. This is getting ridiculous.
330 Curtis Granderson - Anyone who goes 20/20/20/20 (2B, 3B, HR, SB) and blogs on the side is okay by me.
298 Prince Fielder, Ryan Howard, and Adam Dunn: NL Home Runs Leaders
AR13 Alfonso Soriano 50th Anniversary Topps All-Star Rookie
MHR533 Mickey Mantle Home Run History #533 - I'm sure I'll never get tired of these. *cough*
YR60 Chris Young Year in Review May 30, 2007: 5 Shutouts in One Day - Both Chris Youngs in one pack. As an added laugh, Erik Bedard's name is misspelled two different ways on the back (Eric and Erick).
OTG18 Miguel Cabrera Own the Game
TCH9 Albert Pujols Trading Card History: 1916 Zeenuts - That's right, Pujols on Zeenuts.
26 Manny Ramirez: Postseason Highlights ALDS Gold Foil - Ugh, so much to hate about this card. Manny's obnoxious arms in the air home run celebration, the appearance of "Man-Ram" in print on a Topps card, and the pointless gold foil parallel. Moving on...
3 Jeff Suppan Gold Foil - Not a fan of Suppan's politics or gold foil. The next card better be good.
Topps All-Star Rookie Promo - Okay, the NEXT card better be good...
118 Marco Scutaro - It looks like Marco signed his crotch. Tee hee. I'll allow it.
46 Zack Greinke
236 Joe Koshansky RC
239 Richie Sexson
114 Mike Fontenot - The O's gave him up in the Sammy Sosa trade. He might just be the Eckstein of the future, which I don't mean as a compliment.
43 Ryan Dempster
31 Ronny Paulino - Contrary to popular belief, this is not Ron Paul's alter ego.
75 Felix Hernandez
240 Jim Thome - Steve is gonna hunt me down like a dog.
292 Mark Loretta
83 Mark Reynolds
21 Edwin Encarnacion - Notable for the scrawny Cardinals bat boy standing awkwardly in the background.
38 Preston Wilson
121 Mike Cameron
Whew! Considering how long that took, I'm going to be posting one pack a day (imagine that!) until I've run through all ten. It's worth noting that when I tore open the package from the card dealer, there was a blank slat of cardboard sitting on top. My roommate took the initiative to create and present me with the following award:The only way this night could have been better would have been if Mr. Toppinton himself had presented me with the plaque. Now where's that ham?